You Don't Always Know How It Feels
DAILY VITAMIN
Different people grieve in different ways. Some find it easy to adjust to how people want them to feel, while others do not. As such, it becomes absurd to repeatedly tell these individuals that we know how they feel, because truth is we cannot always know how they feel. The Proverbs state that "Only the person involved can know his own bitterness or joy- no one else can really share it" (Pro 14:10 TLB). Let's not always try to play the familiarity card with everybody we come across with an issue worth crying about. Don't think the extent of pain the poor kid is experiencing is nothing to worry about because you were once poor. Don't assume the broken relationship won't make her suicidal because you bounced back from the same a long time ago. Don't believe all single moms find it easy because you did, or that all rape victims will easily recover since you did. Don't think the boy without funds for an education will be alright because you turned out alright. We don't always know how people feel, only them can tell the extremity of the grief. Only their souls bear the majority of the burden, so next time you come across a grieving fellow, don't assume the role of having felt just exactly as they do, rather acknowledge before them that though you may not know how they feel, but you'd always be there to help them feel well again. Sometimes, only a hug may pass this message, some times a phone call, but almost everytime the simple truth that no one else can measure up to feel exactly as the grieving does, with an open arm to help when needed, does the work of an elixir in the healing process. This is God's desire for all of us - to help keep our brethren thinking right (mentally), feeling right (emotionally), associating right (socially), looking right (physically) and living right (spiritually), all to a moment when everything for them starts becoming better than it were during their grief. Hence, extend a hand of care, not with the facade of familiarity, but with the fortitude of love to help them even when you don't feel exactly as they do.
Different people grieve in different ways. Some find it easy to adjust to how people want them to feel, while others do not. As such, it becomes absurd to repeatedly tell these individuals that we know how they feel, because truth is we cannot always know how they feel. The Proverbs state that "Only the person involved can know his own bitterness or joy- no one else can really share it" (Pro 14:10 TLB). Let's not always try to play the familiarity card with everybody we come across with an issue worth crying about. Don't think the extent of pain the poor kid is experiencing is nothing to worry about because you were once poor. Don't assume the broken relationship won't make her suicidal because you bounced back from the same a long time ago. Don't believe all single moms find it easy because you did, or that all rape victims will easily recover since you did. Don't think the boy without funds for an education will be alright because you turned out alright. We don't always know how people feel, only them can tell the extremity of the grief. Only their souls bear the majority of the burden, so next time you come across a grieving fellow, don't assume the role of having felt just exactly as they do, rather acknowledge before them that though you may not know how they feel, but you'd always be there to help them feel well again. Sometimes, only a hug may pass this message, some times a phone call, but almost everytime the simple truth that no one else can measure up to feel exactly as the grieving does, with an open arm to help when needed, does the work of an elixir in the healing process. This is God's desire for all of us - to help keep our brethren thinking right (mentally), feeling right (emotionally), associating right (socially), looking right (physically) and living right (spiritually), all to a moment when everything for them starts becoming better than it were during their grief. Hence, extend a hand of care, not with the facade of familiarity, but with the fortitude of love to help them even when you don't feel exactly as they do.
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