The Oscar Ajoku Blog

  TEST No. 5 HOW TO KNOW YOU’RE LIVING AND NOT MERELY CONFORMING Freedom, in its truest form, is the ability to do what you want to do, when you want to do it, and how you want to do it without having to worry about anyone else; but there's not a lot of that going around now with the way society is wired.  However this is the truest way of discovering who you really are, without the pressure to please, conform or align. The call to find yourself and to be that without any stigma. This is rare; so when you get a stint at it, make the most of it.  In truth, a lot of mankind are still slaves. Slaves not because they are in chains or have been impeded from moving forward but because they have been subtly deceived into not finding their real selves. When you live someone else's script for your life it isn't living, it is pretty much conforming.  Living is to strung out the symphonies that were embedded within you at creation so as to feed the world with the effect that w...

  HOW TO MEASURE YOUR ACTUAL SUCCESS Forget what a lot of performance coaches say, life isn't a competition. This is not a food chain and you are not a predator or prey. Life is a vast sphere of opportunities, and though yes we compete with one another but the real competition is that with our previous selves.  The aim in life is to become better versions of ourselves with each passing day, not better or secondary versions of someone else. Every journey has its route as does every voyager has his way. We are voyagers with unique routes and unique destinations, so it becomes useless to track your progress by someone else's explorations.  The cheetah doesn't see itself as a loser because it hasn't swum the Indian Ocean as the blue whale does and neither does the blue whale sees itself as a failure because it hasn't strode through a safari.  Your performance index is actually measured by how better you are today than you were yesterday and not against anyone else. And...

  TEST No. 1: HOW TO KNOW YOU MIGHT ACTUALLY LOVE THAT PERSON OF INTEREST FOR REAL First, imagine taking away the contingency of intimacy and all romantic affiliations with such a person. Finally, if you are still keen on seeing them/talking to them/spending a great deal of your day with them regardless if you could afterward, then there's something there. Love, as it should be, intimate or not, isn't mainly in the getting; and as such even when there's nothing to get anymore, it thrives yet. TEST No. 2:    HOW TO BE CERTAIN YOU’RE REALLY HAPPY BEING WITH SOMEONE IN A PARTNERSHIP (WHETHER IN BUSINESS TERMS OR OTHERWISE) Does being with the person(s) feel like work? If it does, doesn't mean anything. Life itself feels like work. However if it feels like work you wished you didn't have to do, then you're probably forcing it way too much. And a great rule of life is knowing that people will still be alright without you. It's not your job to make them happy o...